SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

We are all suggesting a CONSULTATION and nothing more. It would be worth your time to know about finance and divorce, separation/reconciliation vs separation/divorce vs reconciliation.

Oddly, one of the things I required of families I worked with was how to get out of a burning house. The whole family, including children, pick a place outside(a tree, the end of the driveway etc)and when the alarm, scream, whatever, is to crawl out of the nearest exit including windows to meet at the designated place. People die from toxic smoke. I bring that up because knowing that info might never be needed but if it is then lives are saved. Look at your marriage, look at your stress, and then get the info you MIGHT need. It gives you some peace of mind to know the steps to take if necessary.

But I just can't help myself, I want (need) to know she isn't waiting for these pay increases to hit before she seeks a divorce. I need to know that she wants to reconcile regardless of money and financial stability. I don't think I can know that without just letting things play out and seeing what she does, and what the timing is.

If she waits for the first increased pay checks to hit and then suddenly has full clarity, I'll know this whole thing about "I don't know" was just a stall tactic.

It could be a stall tactic on your WWs part, but I suspect it is also a stall tactic on your part.

So far, you have given more reasons for staying, and few reasons for leaving. As such, there are roadblocks you put in front of you to slow yourself down.

At the moment, your house (M) is on fire, and you are thinking about what items you should save from the house rather thank thinking about saving your own life.

If all you want is to know the truth than you already probably have it OP. Your wife is full of resentment and has checked out. That's not a sign of someone who really wants to be with you.

Think about the beginning of a relationship, bc that's kind of where you're at now that your WW blew up your old one. Does a new GF or partner who really wants you, show you anything else but that? Even worst, this is a WW who knows she screwed up royally, she should be on her ass begging you to work things out, but that's not what you're getting. Instead you're just waiting and hoping. Lets face it, YOU ARE HOPING that she wakes up and shows true real committment to you.

Why chance it with someone whose already cheated on you to show you any empathy who hasn't already done so after being caught. Cut your losses, protect your future and file. Should she change (highly unlikely) and becomes a great R candidate you can put the D on hold. Cost you almost nothing to file. Protect yourself and dont waste any more time.