Underserving (original poster member #72259) posted at 10:24 PM on Wednesday, June 17th, 2026
Let's see... I am about 6 and a half years post d-day. I haven't posted in a long while, but I wanted to stop by and say, it really does get better. It seems impossible for longer than you think you can stand, but it does.
Hope all my old friends are doing well. I'm so sorry to those of you who find yourselves here.
PS I still can't believe my username is Underserving 😂 Thank you so much shaky hands and watery eyes. 🙃
BW (32)Found out 3 years post end of AD-day 12-9-19In R
Infidelity brings out the cuss in me. I’m not as foul mouthed in real life. ;)
Pogre ( member #86173) posted at 1:54 PM on Thursday, June 18th, 2026
Hi Undeserving. It's nice to meet you. I always appreciate these types of positive updates. I'm glad to hear things are working out for you. I look forward to being 6 years out with this nightmare fading in the rearview mirror. We're a little over a year out from my d day and things are definitely improving, but I still have some rough days.
My wife is weathering the storms well tho. She's in it to win it and has been a model for reconciliation. I've been sticking around to try and pay forward some of the help I got when I first came here, so broken and confused. Those early days are the worst for all of us.
Where am I going... and why am I in this handbasket?
Bountybar ( new member #87455) posted at 4:23 PM on Thursday, June 18th, 2026
Hi there. Thanks so much for this message. I'm 3 months out from D-day and so want to be over this. I know it's early days still. When would you say it stopped dominating your every life. My WS is doing everything right, but I just can't see how things will ever be right again. We both want to be fully reconciled. Would love to hear more about your journey. Thank you.
Oldwounds ( member #54486) posted at 4:41 PM on Thursday, June 18th, 2026
Nice update! I am so glad you are doing better!
Married 36+ years, together 41+ years
Two awesome adult sons.
Dday 6/16 4-year LTA Survived.
M Restored
"It is better to conquer our grief than to deceive it." — Seneca
This0is0Fine ( member #72277) posted at 5:13 PM on Thursday, June 18th, 2026
Hello.
I certainly remember being contemporaries.
Glad to hear you are doing well.
Love is not a measure of capacity for pain you are willing to endure for your partner.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 5:41 PM on Thursday, June 18th, 2026
Thanks for coming back. I'm glad you're doing well.
I always thought you meant to call yourself 'undeserving', meaning that 'you don't deserve being betrayed'. I thought the first 'r' was a typo.Is that correct?
OTOH, we can interpret 'underserving' to mean 'serving others/stifling myself less than I think I should', then that was a good Freudian-slip-type typo. I hope that's clear....
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
d-day - 12/22/2010 Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
