SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I’m on week 4 of officially deciding to divorce and giving WH the papers- which he is delaying signing but he’s on a work trip.

I’m relieved, empty, sad, scared, hopeful, anxious and at peace all at the same time.

I had therapy for the first time since this latest discovery yesterday and it put a lot into perspective for me.

I think after almost 20 years of this nonesense I am finally ready to put it to rest. As in, I am truly stepping forward with ending this marriage and going full force into healing myself.

I don’t think I did that that first betrayal (10 years ago) I think I expected him to recover, make it up to me and to find a way to stay together.

Now I know that is not truly possible. He’d have to put in so much work in such a monumental way and I’m not waiting around to see if that happens.

Trying to stay strong with no contact. I really want to move through this pain and find out who I am without this struggle in my life.

The start of this new beginning is painful, I know I need to just keep moving in the right direction and not let the pain derail me.

Longtime,
You sound like you are in a good place and ready for the next step in your journey. And yes, , you will feel ALL the emotions, but as you move forward you will feel more of the hopeful and peace, less of the anxious and scared.

And good for you going back to IC. It’s really helpful to have a 3rd party help you hear your own internal thoughts and help you articulate your fears and things you are scared to even think.

Keep on moving forward- there are really good days ahead.

Glad you're doing what is best for you. It's sad to see the end of the M, but sometimes it's what you need to be healthy and happy.

Keep working toward the peace & contentment.

I am so proud that you are doing what's best for you! Good luck on your healing journey forward!