Scoobymac21 (original poster new member #83638) posted at 6:52 PM on Thursday, September 12th, 2024
So I caught my gf cheating in some tiny way . So I secretly messaged her affair partner off her Instagram , saying he knows everything ..
Plz help what do u think of his reply .
"Yes I know he has been in touch with my ex wife , LUCKY NOTHING PHYSICAL HAPPENED AMD WE ONLY FLIRTED OVER SNAPCHAT ..
Snapchat is how I caught her .
What do u think what his response meant?
Plz help
BigMammaJamma ( member #65954) posted at 6:59 PM on Thursday, September 12th, 2024
I mean, that is not a whole lot of detail, but I would say it would sound like he knows it was you and he is covering for her?
Me- born in 1984Him- born in 1979We both have 2 kids from previous marriages and we share a four year old. I might be a BS, but at this point, I don't know if I'll ever know.
Update: As of 5/8/2020, my WH confirmed I belong in this club
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 7:34 PM on Thursday, September 12th, 2024
I think there is more to the story than flirting
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 10 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
AnnieOakley ( member #13332) posted at 10:10 PM on Thursday, September 12th, 2024
I think his response is the signal/intent to get their stories straight. Why would you need to emphasize anything if nothing (just flirting 
) happened?
Me= BSHim=xWH (did the work & became the man I always thought he was, but it was too late)M=23+,T=27+dday=7/06, 8/09 (pics at a work function), 11/09 VAR, 6/12 Sep'd, 10/14 Divorced."If you are going through hell, keep going."
Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 10:47 PM on Thursday, September 12th, 2024
This is an AP that thinks he is slick. He knows you will see the response so he is setting the narrative.
Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years
Chaos ( member #61031) posted at 11:41 PM on Thursday, September 12th, 2024
Scoobymac21 I don't think your secret message was secret at all. I'm 99% certain he's 99% certain it was from you. And his response was just bating and f**king with you.
I don't think you are even close to having the whole truth.
Apologies as I don't know your whole story - but the fact that you caught her and this AH isn't blocked tells you all you need to know.
IMHO - girlfriend failed the long term test. Set her free, mourn the loss of who you hoped she was and go about living the first day of the rest of your life infidelity free.
BS-me/WH-4.5yrLTA Married 2+ decades - Children (1 still at home) Multiple DDays w/same AP until I told OBS 2018 Cease & Desist sent spring 2021"Hello–My name is Chaos–You f***ed my husband-Prepare to Die!"
Abcd89 ( member #82960) posted at 10:49 AM on Friday, September 13th, 2024
Was part of it written in lower case and part in capitals? If so I think he is getting the story straight.
No children and not married. She’s failed the dating test.
Scoobymac21 (original poster new member #83638) posted at 8:15 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2024
So after I questioned her I read his reply which she couldn't of as it was late and she was asleep . I questioned her about it then got this .
So I need to tell u something the physical part was just a lift home and he reached in and kissed me but that's all that happened
What would you include as physical this communication went on for over 10 yes apparently.
I'm not silly I know that atleast it's was more than a kiss .
She also said that she sent topless pics and flirted on sanp as he made her feel good about herself ..
Scoobymac21 (original poster new member #83638) posted at 8:26 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2024
I think when she got caught she messaged him in some way saying nothing physical happened and we only flirted on snap .
It seems as his response was pre planned in some way .
In other words everything I know is from what I have found out not what.
She hasn't come clean about anything she just can't remember apparently.
It's fooked I know
Scoobymac21 (original poster new member #83638) posted at 8:29 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2024
All of you answer this
What would u describe as being physical with someone ?especially if u are flirting chatting with and agreeing to get a lift home with them amd sending naughty outs and receiving them ?
Tobster1911 ( new member #81191) posted at 8:47 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2024
I know you are struggling with this and your mind is shying away from it. But as some who’s wife had multiple APs, we have to face the things we don’t want to. It is nearly certain that she had sex with him. Full all the way. The fact that the had direct in person access make it almost 100%. There are rare cases where it didn’t happen but not when clearly she is only admitting to what you find…. Tell her you don’t believe her and have scheduled a polygraph…
[This message edited by Tobster1911 at 8:47 PM, Friday, September 13th]
BH(45), married 16yrs, DDay1 Feb 2022, DDay2 Apr 2022, 2EA + 4PA over 6+ yrs.
Glimmers of hope for change
Chaos ( member #61031) posted at 9:31 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2024
IMHO you are splitting hairs to try to minimize her behaviors and/or justify them to yourself.
What would u describe as being physical with someone ?
If someone is your GF - anything other than a damn handshake.
especially if u are flirting chatting with and agreeing to get a lift home with them amd sending naughty outs and receiving them ?
That alone right there is too damn much.
BS-me/WH-4.5yrLTA Married 2+ decades - Children (1 still at home) Multiple DDays w/same AP until I told OBS 2018 Cease & Desist sent spring 2021"Hello–My name is Chaos–You f***ed my husband-Prepare to Die!"
Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 4:27 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2024
"It was just a kiss" is the first crack in the dam. This is rule number one in "The Cheaters Handbook". That is proof it was physical, kissing is physical. She has failed the interview, she is not W material, cut your losses find a real W candidate.
Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years
1994 ( member #82615) posted at 12:31 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2024
Wrong thread
[This message edited by 1994 at 4:30 PM, Saturday, September 14th]
DoofusMcDoofus ( new member #82967) posted at 5:22 PM on Sunday, September 15th, 2024
Most people don't send pictures of their private parts to others simply because that person made them feel good about themselves. Usually in that case they send such pictures in hopes of recapturing that adrenaline rush they got from showing those parts off in person previously. So unless your GF is doing an Only Fans and sending people titty pics for money, I submit to you you have a liar as a girlfriend.
'tis better to have an end with horror than a horror without end
Scoobymac21 (original poster new member #83638) posted at 11:04 PM on Wednesday, September 18th, 2024
