Yeah, I have to agree with BraveSirRobin. With my WH, it’s one thing to expect these things even 5 years after dday, and I would give him the same courtesy.
But with someone new, it’s completely different. A night out, is just a night out, with me expecting no control over the situation. If my 19 year daughter told me a man was expecting all of this I would tell her there were a lot of red flags in the situation. She is not your WF and even though she cheated in the past, she is not liable for your WF’s bad choices.
This is part of the reason I thought reconciling would be easier for me - who else would put up with me? I have too much baggage! I don’t know how to be normal now and have a real relationship with trust. It would be really hard. I wish you well.
For the record, I don’t have a problem with weekly GNOs. None of my married friends or friends in relationships are “allowed” to have them and I think it sucks. My WH golfs almost weekly and gets guy time, but my girlfriends are on lockdown by their husbands and/or SOs and it’s really crappy. I would love an escape but the only ones who can are single and much younger and then it just feels weird for me. I envy your gf.