Fiancée came home crying on Friday

I do not know what to do. DDay was Friday, she (F 26) came home early from work crying saying she needed to tell me something. She told me she had been cheating with a coworker (M45, married with two kids) for months and on Friday she claims she told me because a scary situation happened between her and the coworker and it turned more physical. I am still very raw and in so much pain and sobbing.

My fiancée and I have been together for 8 years. We were supposed to get married in September of this year. We have a house and two dogs together. I absolutely love her with my entire heart. I lost my sister a few years ago in a car accident and my fiancee showed me how good of a life partner she could be. She was my rock and my safe space. Our relationships have had highs and lows throughout 8 years but we were at a high. We were planning our wedding and having fun and excited to see each other every day. She would always tell me how perfect of a partner I was.

My entire life has been ruined by her and this man. She claims she was vulnerable because of her new job but I can’t get past the fact that going through their messages, I can see that it was her reaching out. She knew that everything they were doing was wrong and that they were crossing boundaries. She would stay late at work to be with him and she told me that she HATED staying late at work. She would pick him over me and I am absolutely devastated. I am writing this at 3 in the morning absolutely sick to my stomach. I do not know if I can get past this. She claims that she is so sorry and this was the worst mistake of her life and that she loves me but right now I hate her. I can’t stand thinking about her because of the images I see inside my head. It makes so sense why she would do this I never could have fathomed that she would be the type of person to be unloyal.

There are other questions absolutely eating away at me I have not slept since Friday and have struggled to eat. I have relocated to my parents house for the time being but she keeps trying to reach out and get me to come home. I don’t know what to do I have prayed and prayed and sobbed and I am so unbelievably broken. I never thought that I would feel this was in my life and I am spiraling. My immediate feelings were to try and reconcile but as I’ve had to deal with the past two days I don’t know if I ever can. We had even spoke in the past about how we had been through so much together and we could work through pretty much anything but I always drew a hard boundary line in our relationship that I would never accept her if she cheated and now she did. I just can’t believe that my life is falling apart and I didn’t do anything to cause it.

27 comments posted: Monday, January 5th, 2026