Newest Member: findthebeautywithin

UneedToSmile

Me: BS 42 years old Him: Lying cheating narcissistic prick 43 years old Married for 18 yrs, together for 20 total Dday: August 19 2019 Divorced: June 12 2020

So this is depression....

New Beginnings....it sounds so positive. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. I feel anxious constantly. I can not relax my muscles. I don't want him back, but I'm so very unsettled. I have never been a depressed person, but I am fully convinced that is exactly what I am now.

I now understand my own sister's struggles that pushed her to complete suicide. I will never do that; I couldn't do that to my kids or parents. But wow, who knew this place was so dark? I talk to friends, and it takes the edge off some times. I pray constantly, and get minimal relief. A lot of people tell me they're happy to see me doing so well. I'm just not.

I'm going to keep reading the stories that are positive here on this thread. Thank you for posting them to show me that it can be reality for me some day. I'm going to try to believe I'm going to come out of this soon. Yes, I am taking meds, and yes I am talking to a counselor. I truly am happy for all of you that made it through to the other side. Thanks for listening!

13 comments posted: Saturday, May 23rd, 2020

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