"True character is revealed in the choices a human being makes under pressure. The greater the pressure, the deeper the revelation, the truer the choice to the character's essential nature."BH: 50, WW: 49 Wed: Feb.'96 DDAY1: 12.20.16 DDAY2: 12.23.19
        
    
 
    
    
	
        
        
    Moving over here
 
	I've been in the Reconcilation forum for the last year and now I'm moving over here. More of my story is here: 
 
 
	https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=640195 
 
 
	I told my WW I want a divorce last night, so I'm trying to think about the best tangible steps I need to take now. The die is cast, as they say. 
 
 
	I know not everyone would lead with telling WW "I want a divorce" but it's how I've done it.  I want an amicable mediated settlement, if possible, and right now that looks like a strong possibility. I want a 50/50 split on our youngest child (our older child is now an adult and is 18) so we can be good co-parents. I also want to walk away without having to pay alimony. Just a clean split of assets down the middle. 
 
 
	I realize I will probably not get everything I want. I also realize things could turn nasty if my WW develops a sense of injustice or decides to violate my trust again by preemptively filing or whatever. I have no intention of doing that to her and my greatest hope is simply to work on this together. 
 
 
	Where are good checklists, things I need to be thinking about aside from the usual "go see an atty" which yes, I will be doing. 
 
		 296 comments		 posted: Tuesday, August 4th, 2020