Any advice on how to keep moving forward after seeing ex husband with the mistress & her family
Does anyone have any wise words of wisdom on how they move forward every time they see their ex husband and the mistress he cheated on you with.
I used to live in a small beach side town with my ex husband. I originally owned a small beach house there which was rented out. My new husband and I moved there after he immigrated to my country from the UK. It had been a long held dream of mine to live there once I returned to my country after living in the UK for five years with him. Little did I realise that my husband then started an after with a girl half his age who has lived there all her life. As most of you here in the forum understand the finding out of his affair(s) & the subsequent aftermath (including bullying from her) was horrific & life changing. When we divorced I managed to keep my house & I did then meet my new partner about a year later. My new partner & I had the opportunity to move away to a new dream beach side location due to work so we sold our houses and moved away. I was so happy but sadly we then moved back to a nearby location by the beach due to covid & to help out with my partners parents farm. We still have connections with our original beachside friends, are still members at the fishing/boat club & compete on a regular basis at the local fishing competitions. When I was married to my ex husband he did not frequent the boat club at all but now every time I go there both he & his mistress are both there. Him being high on narcissistic traits & a high functioning alcoholic you can only imagine his behaviour. It feels like he is purposely walking past my table or making sure he is in plain view of me, playing the part. I try extremely hard to ignore him & her and act as if nothing is wrong, but it is extremely overwhelming, it causes me nightmares (I’m a war veteran) & for the next couple of days my mood is extremely flat and I feel like I’m back at square one again. I’m now at the point of not entering in any more fishing competitions & never going to the boat club/beach again. I feel defeated. I absolutely love going to the beach, seeing all my friends, but when I see them, my world just crashes. I don’t have any support from my partner about this and it’s something that I can never discuss with him, he has no understanding of the situation and I am resentful of him for his lack of care and disregard when I do try and ask for help. Does anyone have any insight on how I can move forward. I’ve done a lot of counselling due to my war experiences but this is one thing that I just seem to get stuck on. The next competition is in two weeks and I really don’t want to go because I know they will be there. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Gosh this seems so pitiful when the world is in so much turmoil, but I so want to conquer this.
10 comments posted: Monday, February 10th, 2025
