SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Hi all,
Looking for some reassurance guidance if anyone has any positive stories please?

I’ve been separated for five months, still in the marital home, and after the first few months of feeling really strong, I’m feeling low again. Wondering if I made the wrong decision, for reference my husband cheated on me for a year with a girl half his age, I kept catching him and having awful gut feelings to which he lied, kept giving him chances but he didn’t stop. In the end I had no choice, we have two young children and he is financially much better off than me, so this has been a very difficult decision but there were times where I felt like I was losing my mind in his lies.

Anyway, does this feeling get better? I am a director and work for the business he predominately owns, so I can continue to work with him which feels impossible but the salary is good - or he’ll have to buy me out, I can fly solo completely but I have no idea what I’ll do because my drive/ motivation is at an all time low! How do you find your purpose again at 35? How do people juggle being a single mum, earn a reasonable wage, workout etc and eventually meet another partner… If id stayed maybe he would have stopped in his own time, but I begged, cried and pleaded to which he denied and still continued.

Im so resentful that ive supported him for so long and he’s put me in this position… I’m grieving my family and am concerned I’ll never meet a nice man? Maybe the grass isn’t greener.

We are about to commence legal proceedings..

Help please 💛

Hi MrsB.
You do it the same way you eat an elephant - one bite at a time.

I don’t have kids, but folks tell me sometimes it’s easier to not have the WS in the day-to-day. They muck up the system and make more work.
But you’ll find your rhythm. And over time you will enjoy the time when they kids are with WS— it will be hard at first, but soon you will see that you will get a little time for you and to get done the stuff you couldn’t when the kids are with you.

As for your career — an IC may be able to help. And dream a little. Obviously you have skills. What did you want to do when you got out of school? What things interest you? You may be able to retrain/go back to school and do something new. Have you looked around for other jobs just to see what they are paying? I get that right now you have no energy for that, but start looking around a bit. Until then, ,just focus on keeping your job. That can be a future step you take.

As for working out, get creative. Walk with the kids, use your lunch break a few days a week, watch videos after the kids go to bed.

It will not be easy at first, but you can do it. You are a mom- we know they are all super strong!