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Newest Member: findthebeautywithin

Just Found Out :
Boundaries and Consequences 101 for all new BS

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Fighting2Survive ( member #28410) posted at 8:33 PM on Monday, July 2nd, 2012

Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces

posts: 7279   ·   registered: Apr. 30th, 2010   ·   location: NC
id 5909216
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 lordhasaplan? (original poster member #30079) posted at 1:43 PM on Wednesday, July 4th, 2012

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2106   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 5911573
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homewrecked2011 ( member #34678) posted at 6:00 PM on Friday, July 6th, 2012

This is great info!

Sometimes He calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage, but calms His child. Dday 12/19/11I went to an attorney and had him served. Shocked the hell out of him, with D papers, I'm proud to say!D final10/30/2012Me-55

posts: 5508   ·   registered: Jan. 30th, 2012
id 5914571
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 lordhasaplan? (original poster member #30079) posted at 11:45 PM on Monday, July 16th, 2012

Bump

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2106   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 5929579
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WarehouseGuy ( member #6037) posted at 12:04 AM on Tuesday, July 17th, 2012

This needs to go in the healing library.

Great post!

WHG

If you see your ex with someone else don't be jealous. Our parents taught us to give our old,used toys to the less fortunate.

posts: 7042   ·   registered: Dec. 15th, 2004   ·   location: Michigan
id 5929603
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pmal64 ( member #13551) posted at 4:29 AM on Wednesday, July 18th, 2012

.:~*~:. .:~*~:..:~*~:. .:~*~:..:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:..:~*~:.
BS-me-55
WH -60
"when they show you who they are, believe them"

posts: 588   ·   registered: Feb. 5th, 2007   ·   location: down south
id 5931411
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hank9898 ( member #35405) posted at 3:53 AM on Tuesday, July 24th, 2012

Bump

Me - BH (46)
Two great kids
Son (20) US Army
Daughter (18) College student

posts: 149   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2012   ·   location: Minnesota
id 5939788
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Fighting2Survive ( member #28410) posted at 9:15 PM on Tuesday, July 31st, 2012

Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces

posts: 7279   ·   registered: Apr. 30th, 2010   ·   location: NC
id 5951034
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Keepcalm ( member #36234) posted at 2:07 PM on Thursday, August 2nd, 2012

I agree Healing Library.

BS Me 57
WS Him 55
Married 30 yrs
DDay 1/28/2012
I have no idea what is going on

posts: 200   ·   registered: Jul. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Virginia
id 5953368
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 lordhasaplan? (original poster member #30079) posted at 12:47 PM on Thursday, August 9th, 2012

Bump

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2106   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 5963482
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 lordhasaplan? (original poster member #30079) posted at 4:29 PM on Saturday, August 11th, 2012

Bump

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2106   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 5967034
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Fighting2Survive ( member #28410) posted at 12:42 AM on Thursday, August 16th, 2012

Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces

posts: 7279   ·   registered: Apr. 30th, 2010   ·   location: NC
id 5974337
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Gr8Lady ( member #36307) posted at 1:59 AM on Thursday, August 16th, 2012

I SO needed this information, especially today.

Thank you...

BS: Me (70yo)FWH: HIM (72 yo)) serial infidelities over past 35 years
DD: Multiple unconfirmed until 2013

friends wife lasting 10 years. TT over a
year a year. Now his health is declining,
among the lack of communication.

posts: 762   ·   registered: Jul. 31st, 2012
id 5974451
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sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 12:36 AM on Tuesday, August 28th, 2012

bump

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 30462   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 5991681
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 lordhasaplan? (original poster member #30079) posted at 2:14 PM on Tuesday, September 4th, 2012

Bump for Brybry

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2106   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 6003005
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sickrn ( member #36398) posted at 4:53 PM on Tuesday, September 4th, 2012

No matter how many times I read this, I get something new out of it each time. Thanks for bumping and the post...I seem to need constant reminders to do anything good for me....

M=23 yrs
DD-22
BW=46
WH=46
DDAY 6/12

In R....trust but verify!

The truth can't hurt you, it's just like the dark.
It scares you witless,
But in time you see things clear and stark - Elvis

posts: 89   ·   registered: Aug. 8th, 2012   ·   location: Purgatory
id 6003261
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Spelljean ( member #35624) posted at 1:04 AM on Thursday, September 6th, 2012

bump

WH: 41
me: BS, 45
Together 18 1/2 years, married 17
DDAY 8/2/12
OW: EA- friend of 4 months
Status: separated

posts: 1037   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2012   ·   location: California
id 6005845
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bufffalo ( member #21854) posted at 8:55 AM on Saturday, September 8th, 2012

DDay 9/25/2008

BH-me

posts: 6172   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2008   ·   location: Texas
id 6009906
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Spelljean ( member #35624) posted at 4:09 PM on Sunday, September 9th, 2012

Bump

WH: 41
me: BS, 45
Together 18 1/2 years, married 17
DDAY 8/2/12
OW: EA- friend of 4 months
Status: separated

posts: 1037   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2012   ·   location: California
id 6011047
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 lordhasaplan? (original poster member #30079) posted at 3:38 PM on Friday, September 14th, 2012

Bump

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2106   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 6018887
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