Groot
I’m so glad you’re here! There are a few of us "newbies" that seem to be walking down a very similar path. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it a million times more, it’s "comforting" knowing I’m not alone and my feelings are completely normal and validated. This seriously gives me some feeling of "normalcy" as I navigate and process things as I go.
I think that your plans for your Anniversary sound wonderful, plans have been placed by your H as per your request and with no promises in place, but a complete "go with it" as you see fit. No expectations is the way to go. I told my H I wanted to do nothing - I’ll probably get more of a "thrill" making him feel like the trash he was entertaining this time last year. I seriously have been on this kick of "oh, you want to do something special, what were you doing a year ago today!" 🙄 Anyways … tonight we had some shit go down (stay tuned for a potential separate rant post) so it honestly has put me in a further "mood". Regardless, I know he will try to the best of his ability to make it as less shitty as it already will be. Guess that’s what I’m striving for … to have a less shitty day then today.
Yes! Pretty spot on. HB has gone and intimacy has been an issue for me lately, I wavier between anger and sadness … but I am mostly sad and it’s really hit me lately that this is MY life (I’m still waiting for someone to pinch me, to wake me up from this nightmare), and I have been avoiding him in the evenings as well. The past probably 2ish months I’ve started doing my own thing in the evenings again … I just don’t want to spend anymore time with him than I have too and I’ve been really enjoying just being by myself.
Your Dday plans sound amazing! I have actually booked a hotel (by myself) and will be spending my time doing whatever it is I want to do that day! Oddly enough, I’m looking forward to it.
Thank you again for the kind words and support. It means so much ❤️
WB1430
I’m sorry your experiencing this as well. WS really don’t get it or understand just how much their infidelity affects EVERYTHING. My H seems to think there is so much to celebrate … it’s hard to actually entertain him when he speaks like that (I end up shaking my head, walking away and grumbling under my breath).
If you ended up continuing your conversation tonight, I hope it went well and you gained some clarity from it.
Webbit
Thank you Webbit, I think I remember your post about your anniversary plans sometime this past spring. I’m so glad the day ended up working out for you and the advice to just go and enjoy the trip with no said expectations is some solid advice - it sounds you did exactly that.
My hope is that all of us "newbies" here trying to R will be able to "celebrate" special days like this again … one day ❤️