Topic is Sleeping.
EllieKMAS (original poster member #68900) posted at 11:27 PM on Friday, April 10th, 2020
Holy shit am I so goddam happy that my D got finalized right before the world went tits-up... Aside from the fact that my xdoouchehole went through a roll a day of TP on his own, he was also completely incapable of existing with himself. I can't even imagine how sick of his shit I would be if I had been stuck in a house with him for the last month. So grateful that things worked out with the timing.
And speaking of houses - I bought my house in 2015. For 'us'. We had a laundry list of things we wanted to do to it, number 1 of which was replacing the revolting carpet. We used to get into arguments about what we wanted to do to the house, mostly because he had no taste at all. Also he had a very overblown sense of his abilities to do 'house stuff'. Welp - my bonus from work this year was enough for me to replace my carpets finally! I cannot tell you how happy doing that makes my home feel. Plus i am taking all this time I have to purge things. I am going one closet/room at a time and shedding all the crap I had accumulated during my M.
My next project I am super excited for - starting on my homemade 'me' ornaments and decorations for my awesome Christmas tree. I decided that in December - I am tossing all the christmas stuff I had with him and making my own stuff that is tres moi. Should be some fun!
Just wanted to share those thoughts for anyone still in the hell of separation or facing a divorce and feeling scared about it. Hard and heart-breaking as it is/was, life after is really not so bad. Different, but better in a lot more ways than I anticipated.
Hope everyone is surviving the apocalypse OK!!
"No, it's you mothafucka, here's a list of reasons why." – Iliza Schlesinger
"The love that you lost isn't worth what it cost and in time you'll be glad that it's gone." – Linkin Park
WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 4:00 AM on Saturday, April 11th, 2020
Great post, Ellie!! I did the Christmas ornament thing last year. I also switched out the tree skirt. Cathartic!! And I got lots of compliments on my new tree decor.
The timing of this seems perfect for you, as you are able to purge all of that old marriage stuff. Have fun!!
I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural
nothisfriend ( member #53171) posted at 10:15 PM on Sunday, April 12th, 2020
So happy to hear your peace and clarity!
Me: BS 50 (at the time) Him: WH 53 (at the time) D-Day: 10/25/15 Married: 28 years. One son, age 18 (at the time)
D final 2016 REMARRIED to a marvelous guy on 4/22/23
deena04 ( member #41741) posted at 3:51 AM on Monday, April 13th, 2020
Good for you! Sometimes you just have to take life and make it yours.
Me FBS 40s, Him XWS older than me (lovemywife4ever), D, He cheated before M, forgot to tell me. I’m free and loving life.
thatbpguy ( member #58540) posted at 4:51 PM on Monday, April 13th, 2020
Keep at it. Make new friends. Have a few parties...
ME: BH Her: WW DDay 1, R; DDay 2, R; DDay 3, I left; Divorced Remarried to a wonderful woman
"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." C.S. Lewis
As a dog returns to his vomit, so a fool repeats his folly...
CaliforniaNative ( member #60149) posted at 7:22 PM on Monday, April 13th, 2020
Yes your marriage didn’t workout, but after a break from men... you will never guess who you’re going to meet....
The strong
Independent
Sassy
Best
Version of yourself!!!!⭐️⭐️⭐️
Congratulations!
phmh ( member #34146) posted at 1:59 AM on Tuesday, April 14th, 2020
It's been 8 years for me, and I am still so happy every day that I divorced and got a restart in what life should be. So happy to read that you are loving life as well!!!
Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!
Married: 11 years, no kids
Character is destiny
risingtide ( member #54148) posted at 4:43 PM on Friday, April 17th, 2020
I'm very happy for you! I did the same thing with Christmas. XWH was finally completely gone with all of his stuff in 11/18. I didn't even set up the old tree. I got a new metallic tree for the bedroom and got vintage ornaments. In 2019 I added more vintage ornaments. My sweet bedroom tree is now my new "me" tradition, and it's great.
Me - BS, 57 Him - XWH, 70. Married 15 years, no kids. My first marriage, his second. DD#1 July 2016, DD#2 June 2018, D final 09/18/18.
skeetermooch ( member #72169) posted at 3:47 AM on Sunday, April 19th, 2020
Ellie,
I really needed your happy story today! I'm still doing the back and forth and miserable. The abyss scares me so much. But seeing the joy and freedom leap from the screen in these posts gives me courage.
Thanks!!
Me: BS 56 on DDay 1 - 7/2019 DIVORCED - 1/2021
Topic is Sleeping.
